Kharma Chameleon

You know Kharma is real if the following happens:

Grover Norquist will get a message that the IRS is auditing him, sending him into a state of shock, causing him to drown in a bathtub.

Dick Cheney will discover that the parts in his pacemaker were outsourced to China where a 8 year old boy making 12 cents an hour installed the wires faultily.

Dr. Frist will have a stroke and be in a level 2 coma where all he can still sense is pain, but the twitches an animation make people 'champion' his cause to stay alive and on a feeding tube for 15 years.

Tom Delay will fall down a well and have his testes gnawed off by rats. In order to survive, he'll have to eat those rats.

Ed Gillespie will literally try to hang onto a cliff by the skin of his chinny-chin-chin and plummet into a chasm.

George Bush will have to report back to Alabama/Texas to finish his guard duty and suffer permanent disability when he is accidentally run over by a swift boat. Then he will be forced to rely on VA care.


If even one of those freak accidents happen, I'll convert to Bhuddism.

Evolution Debate Solved

Yes, yes, I know, it's been a long time. But I'm back, more or less.

Anyway, as we probably all know, 'concerned' parents and plebes from the great state of Kansas have brought back debate on the 'theory' of evolution. Because intelligent design has 'intelligent' in its title, people think they're intelligent if they try and push this crap on the schools. Well, you can debate it all you want, but I have a solution, and it's a simple one.

The main beef from creationists is that evolution is just a 'theory'. Well, they're right, in the sense that scientists believe it to be so (IE: established beyond all doubt as a usable, working model), not a theory like a layman believes (IE: 'I've got a theory that it was sasquatch what tore up your bed o' turnips'). But fine, I'm willing to allow Kansas citizens to abandon the theory of evolution on the grounds that it is unproven science. No recriminations, no debate.

Here's the catch. They must also abandon all other theories. Here's a few Kansans are no longer allowed to use.

The theory of gravity. Yes, Newton's theory is just that, a theory. We cannot technically prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that it is mass pulling mass in on itself that creates gravity. We're about as sure that's the cause as we are that Australopithecine is our direct ancestor. So no gravity for you. Please spin off the planet at 1,000 miles per hour.


A kansas woman actively proving the theory of gravity by weighing a ton.

Germ theory. Yes all modern medicine is based on the theory that germs directly cause infection and disease. So, if you haven't spun off the planet yet, stop taking your antibiotics, bacitiracin and vitamins. God will protect you.